Modesty

I prefer decency than modesty.
I am for the freedom of speech of the body.

That's not easy to understand that, for some Hasidic and frum men.

I had some conversations about this subject with them.

As you know, i refuse to leave my cleavage in my closet. Likewise for my sandals.
But it doesn't mean that i am disrespectful when i am going to the shul. :-)

I don't wear mini skirt or short. I have 3/4 or long sleeves. If my dress or skirt is too short, i wear a legging.

If i have to talk to someone, i look at him or her in her/his eyes, not his/her toes.
Copy that? :-)

Ahavas Chesed, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein

What are they looking at?, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein

But this constant speech by people who want to give me lessons about my modesty starts to annoy me.

A bochur wrote recently an article for Collive.com.
http://www.collive.com/show_news.rtx?id=31891&alias=a-bochurs-advice-to-girls#comments

His text doesn't sound to have been written by a young man. I felt mad at him indeed.
He didn't have the courage to sign with a real name!
Either he is virgin, either he is an old pervert man.
If he is a virgin, let's talk with him, once he will taste the flesh.

Two weeks later, a modest girl replied to him on the same website:
http://www.collive.com/show_news.rtx?id=32001&alias=a-girls-advice-to-bochurim

She slapped his face in this letter, and it was good to read it!

Before criticizing, Messieurs, clean up your own backyard!

Why do you think that Hashem asks women to hide their body?
Because of you, Messieurs, and your testosterone!

Rascalette on trotinette, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein

Shabbos evening service, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein

I too admit that i look at men in the streets.
Mother Nature gave me eyes, so i enjoy their company, and looking at their eyes, their lips and the way they touch themselves.
But not the way you do it, Messieurs!
Not easy for you to look at our eyes when you have to dive in our cleavage.
The breasts don't talk! Did you know that? Our eyes will talk to you better.
Do women look at your cherries? Not really! :-)

Yes, we are supposed to make sacrifices by wearing modest clothes to avoid you to have an erection during a Shabbos service. :-)
But that's not enough, we have to do it in any context.
Hashem decided that to protect us from you.

Did you read what this modest girl said?
Even dressing modestly, you can't handle your testosterone on leash.

So what's the point now?

The ancestor dominating the Bochurim, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein 

A little rascal dominating his older brothers, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein

If you want modest women, be modest yourself in the way you dress and in your behavior and acts.
When you have your eyes on our breasts, cleavage or not, be more discreet! I saw you! :-)

Do you know how many men like being naked to compare their body and also mister P.?
That's a funny game! But only for you! Not for me!

At 770, i observed the girls jumping above the table. They hold their dresses not to show their undies covered by thick tights. There was something elegant in the way they did it. But we were between women, and we have all the same sexual attributes. Hidden by 2 coats of clothes, it should be fine.
Maybe that's because of the cameras, and some pervert is watching the ladies! :-)


I used to be more "modest" when i was younger.
And i lived a nightmare.
It was during my first time in Istanbul. We were covered because of the visits of mosques.
I have been there three times and, each time, the experience was different.
We were 6 people (5 girls, one boy).
The inhabitants of this city can't stop touching us, the women.
But i think that the male friend too has been touched once.
The bus were packed and to feel a hand touching me all the time was annoying.
I didn't count either how many slaps and pinching out that i received on my tushes.

After 4 days, four of our friends left for Cappadocia.
We were two girls in the city.
We were on our nerves: honk honk of the cabs, the dirt of the city, and the men who behaved like perverts.
One guy said to my friend in the street: "I want to f*** you".
A young man of 15 years old followed us and talked to us during one hour in the streets.
The bellboy in the hotel harassed me to bring me tea and sweets in my room. I said no, and each time, he knocked on the door. I had to throw him away! He was always very close to me in the elevator to touch me.

I actually like Istanbul. That's a beautiful city, rich of history.
Our hotel was in a street full of restaurants. They put the TV outside to watch soccer games. And also they spied us all the time.
One server insisted a lot to hang out with me in a nightclub. I replied all the time: "Maybe".
He replied: "The French always say maybe which means 'no'. The German women say yes." German woman has the reputation to be an easy girl in Istanbul.
When we got out of the hotel, we checked if he was not there.
One day, i decided to revenge. I poured, at night, a glass of water on the men, by the window.
They spied us more and more. Bad idea! :-)

Unfortunately, we bumped into the server who lived around our hotel. He offered us a boat trip for a few hours.
We were cautious, but we went with him to see what kind of boat it was.
That was a sort of boat for tourists.
My friend, who traveled with me has the same roots than me.
She is also like me, she defends the rights of the women. :-)
On the boat, we met a very nice couple from Saudi Arabia.
Then, we stopped at a cafe, along the Bosphorus.
The boat trip was amazing. Istanbul is incredible.
I love terraces along the water.
The couple offered us a drink. My friend and I remained quiet, but the water was boiling inside us.
Each time, we talked to the wife, she turned her head to have the approval of her husband.
Once we were back, we talked about that with my friend, that never, we would like to live with a man like that. Both of us, we don't shut our mouth, thus there will be too many fights with a husband like that.
We felt sorry for this woman. But that's their culture.

The second time was for a seminar. That was better because it was the winter, and Ramadan.
They can't focused on pinching our tushes, they think of food. At the sundown, you can enjoy the city.
Everyone is eating, our tushes were free to move around.

Modest or not, you have something in your blood, that women handle differently.

Show the example, and we will follow you!

That's your problem, not ours. 

Start first! :-)

Cute daddy playing with his children, September 2014, ©emmarubinstein