All the meetings i had with the H babies were fine. One was crazy and started to force me to do him something sexual. I was taller than him so i punched his face. I am kidding, i just made him understand that i didn't want that. So he stopped and we said goodbye.
Yesterday, i met a man of 38 years old pretending he was Hasidic. The connection was good and funny by email and text. He wanted to talk on the phone but i dislike it. He thought i have something to hide. What can i hide?
He has been married in his early 20s. He was born in the Holy Land. He has no kids.
He didn't meet shikse a lot, just once. He kissed her but refused to sleep with her because it will be wrong according to the Torah. I was intrigued indeed to meet another H baby with a new definition of what it's to have sex.
In the same time, my feelings was shared between his ease of not being scared of meeting me fast and this Dog-ly devoted restraint not to go further with a shiksa.
He didn't really want to tell me from which he was from, where he lived… His English was good. He said he has short peyos. He explained me the way he could dress up. So i thought he was probably from Chabad.
He was surprised that i know some Jewish words.
We decided to meet in a bar in my area around 10pm. He is Jewish, so he was late (dixit a H baby who told me one day that the Jews are the worse with running late).
I started to fall asleep on my bed, i woke up around 5am 4 days a week…
More than one hour later, he called me to let me know he was parked around. He talked a lot, so we were wasting time instead of meeting fast.
Still such this ease. I was more and more suspicious that he met more than one shiksa. And he started to talk American music bands. He was happy that we have something in common to talk about…
We decided to meet at one of a corner of my block. He told me that he was wearing a baseball cap and i couldn't see his eyes at first sight. I thought of the shadow of the cap.
At first sight, i saw a hipster, Jewish for sure and with sunglasses at 11pm. Wtf is this?
I dislike hipsters and their self-importance to like things they don't understand, their fake laid-back…
And i have one in front of me in his car.
I understood right away that all he said online was a comedy and a joke.
He didn't take his sunglasses off.
He was parked on a bus line and didn't want to get out of his car. I didn't want to jump in his car too. I didn't feel this guy.
He was talking all the times. He admitted he slept with many shikse and i also understood he was not Hasidic. He was clear about that, saying he hated them.
He was so pretentious like lots of people wanted to talk to him all the time but he has no friend, only one closed friend.
I saw a man changing his mood every seconds. He said that he could be sweet and evil if someone hurts him he hurts back! Schizophrenic i asked? No. What are the reasons to hurt back someone just because you have been hurt?
He talked about his penis, the size impressed girls. Come on man, at 38 you have a penis fetish? Do you kiss him? :-)
The last straw for me was when he started to be mean. I asked him kindly why he was late. Work!
What kind of work? 'He doesn't matter', he replied. He asked mine, i replied the same at him.
I couldn't ask questions, and i was laughing of this situation inside me.
The last straw was when he said that i might be a prostitute because I wake up so early.
The call of my bed was the good excuse to say goodbye.
I talked to him at the window of his car. Yes, like a prostitute with 4 cops in my back preparing the Caribbean Parade.
'Nice to meeting you!'. I just said 'bye'. No, it was not nice. He lied about everything and hated Hasidim because they lie. Let me laugh!
He has no respect for the Hasidim. I don't blame him to have his point of view but look around you instead of looking at the penis. Or stop conversation with it instead of predenting you like human beings when you said you trust nobody.
Who can trust a liar?
He was totally ignorant. He thought i was Jewish because i knew Jewish words. I use a few and if he was a little more involved in the American culture, he could find that many Jewish words are used in movies, plays…
He wants to get married and have kids, good luck jerk!
Friday, August 30, 2013
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Yom Kippur is on its way
I can feel it. The big day where all the sins are forgiven before re-doing the same bad things during one year till the next Yom Kippur.
They are here like ghosts getting out of graves.
I received emails of apologies and i have to forgive without choice.
If unfortunately i reply that i make the choice to not forgive them because enough is enough, i dive in a world of denial, dishonesty.
Since last Christmas, i ignore the emails, text messages of a virgin man, 26 years old.
The last contact with him was so stupidly confusing. He pretended that he has no place to sleep, only his car. He wanted to sleep in my place and blah blah blah. I said no. The day after he blamed me.
I didn't believe: have you ever seen a H baby sleeping like a homeless in the streets. It never happened.
And yesterday, i was in the mood to reply to his umpteenth email of apologies to tell him he could remove my email address definitively. But he forgot that i have a good memory of his meanness.
This community of 'rebel' is very small and it's easy to see the connections, the sixth degree of separation…
I know many things about some of them. I never told them, i avoid gossips.
This one gossiped about me and he did it with H babies who know me very well.
First he lied to my friends saying he was married, and then i wanted to threaten his wife by sending a letter.
I didn't give him the details. I have been harsh with him.
Each time, he said that he has changed and that he felt sorry.
The leopard doesn't change his spots.
I told him that he hurt me, he replied he hurt nobody. Why did he send an email to apologize?
He pretended that it was not him who stabbed me in my back.
He gave his contact info to my friends.
So what am i supposed to do? To give up.
I did because he wanted proofs. I am not going to betray my friends.
He felt bad. I don't want to have compassion for him anymore. I helped him a lot, replying to his sexual questions like a gynecologist, listening to him when he felt bad with the burden of the community, his parents, the Torah… I pushed back my boundaries to close my eyes on his non common sense.
So, now i want to know how they can feel the forgiveness of Dog. There is only one justice in this community? The Dog one? Where is the human justice?
They are here like ghosts getting out of graves.
I received emails of apologies and i have to forgive without choice.
If unfortunately i reply that i make the choice to not forgive them because enough is enough, i dive in a world of denial, dishonesty.
Since last Christmas, i ignore the emails, text messages of a virgin man, 26 years old.
The last contact with him was so stupidly confusing. He pretended that he has no place to sleep, only his car. He wanted to sleep in my place and blah blah blah. I said no. The day after he blamed me.
I didn't believe: have you ever seen a H baby sleeping like a homeless in the streets. It never happened.
And yesterday, i was in the mood to reply to his umpteenth email of apologies to tell him he could remove my email address definitively. But he forgot that i have a good memory of his meanness.
This community of 'rebel' is very small and it's easy to see the connections, the sixth degree of separation…
I know many things about some of them. I never told them, i avoid gossips.
This one gossiped about me and he did it with H babies who know me very well.
First he lied to my friends saying he was married, and then i wanted to threaten his wife by sending a letter.
I didn't give him the details. I have been harsh with him.
Each time, he said that he has changed and that he felt sorry.
The leopard doesn't change his spots.
I told him that he hurt me, he replied he hurt nobody. Why did he send an email to apologize?
He pretended that it was not him who stabbed me in my back.
He gave his contact info to my friends.
So what am i supposed to do? To give up.
I did because he wanted proofs. I am not going to betray my friends.
He felt bad. I don't want to have compassion for him anymore. I helped him a lot, replying to his sexual questions like a gynecologist, listening to him when he felt bad with the burden of the community, his parents, the Torah… I pushed back my boundaries to close my eyes on his non common sense.
So, now i want to know how they can feel the forgiveness of Dog. There is only one justice in this community? The Dog one? Where is the human justice?
Monday, August 26, 2013
Friday, August 23, 2013
Another musical Friday
In the last post, i talked about the movie Rabbi Jacob.
Yesterday i met the double of Michael Jackson.
Today on Facebook, a friend of mine posted this video.
This video is totally appropriate for a Shabbos Shalom. That's sad not to listen to music for Shabbos. :-)
They edited the music of Rabbi Jacob on the song Thriller by Michael Jackson.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhsaXsA219U
Enjoy H babies and gut Shabbos!
Yesterday i met the double of Michael Jackson.
Today on Facebook, a friend of mine posted this video.
This video is totally appropriate for a Shabbos Shalom. That's sad not to listen to music for Shabbos. :-)
They edited the music of Rabbi Jacob on the song Thriller by Michael Jackson.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhsaXsA219U
Enjoy H babies and gut Shabbos!
Monday, August 19, 2013
Why i started this blog
First it was to talk about my research about my roots and also a part of my family who lives here and that i don't know.
And finally, i talk about my Hasidic experiences with my H babies. Through their stories, i build my past, an imaginary past of the old ones living in the 21rst century with the habits of old times.
I talked with 2 H babies from Crown Heights recently, and they told me to check on a website. I forgot the name right now. You can try to find your ancestry.
I have two big issues, i don't have the first name of my grand-father and i just have the first name and last name of my grand-mother, her married name.
The best way is to start by France and ask the city Hall of Neuilly-sur-Seine where my dad was born, i presume. And i could have the names of my grand-parents, if they were born in Vilnius or another city in Lithuania. I might have more information about their brothers, sisters if they had ones.
Yesterday i talked with a woman. We had already talked a couple of months ago about a French movie called 'Rabbi Jacob' (1973) with Louis de Funès. He is one of a typically French funny actor.
This movie shows him dancing with Hasidim. His character is very racist, very old-fashioned French…
It's very funny how he is shocked when he learned that his driver is Jewish. He doesn't know what it means to be Jewish. His ignorance is hilarious.
This is the trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLwHaK86DsM
You can watch the movie on Youtube with English subtitles.
She is designer and she gave me her business card. I saw her last name, that's mine.
I told her and asked her if she has family in France: no. But she remembered she has been to a wedding and the bride had the same first name that my father.
She would like to organize a big meeting in Central Park with all the people who have the same name than ours. How many will we be? She is happy each time she meets someone with the same name. Me too.
In the same time, i have online conversation with a French H baby, a Lubavitch who lives in the same area where i used to live in Paris. He thinks that Americans are more open-minded with Hasidim. He prefers to meet an American shiksa when he comes here 2, 3 times a year. That's weird for me to speak French with a Hasidic.
I keep on selecting all the emails i traded so far. Sometimes i re read them and i can see how ignorant i was and how many things i have to learn to be a 'perfect' Jewish shiksa.
And finally, i talk about my Hasidic experiences with my H babies. Through their stories, i build my past, an imaginary past of the old ones living in the 21rst century with the habits of old times.
I talked with 2 H babies from Crown Heights recently, and they told me to check on a website. I forgot the name right now. You can try to find your ancestry.
I have two big issues, i don't have the first name of my grand-father and i just have the first name and last name of my grand-mother, her married name.
The best way is to start by France and ask the city Hall of Neuilly-sur-Seine where my dad was born, i presume. And i could have the names of my grand-parents, if they were born in Vilnius or another city in Lithuania. I might have more information about their brothers, sisters if they had ones.
Yesterday i talked with a woman. We had already talked a couple of months ago about a French movie called 'Rabbi Jacob' (1973) with Louis de Funès. He is one of a typically French funny actor.
This movie shows him dancing with Hasidim. His character is very racist, very old-fashioned French…
It's very funny how he is shocked when he learned that his driver is Jewish. He doesn't know what it means to be Jewish. His ignorance is hilarious.
This is the trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLwHaK86DsM
You can watch the movie on Youtube with English subtitles.
She is designer and she gave me her business card. I saw her last name, that's mine.
I told her and asked her if she has family in France: no. But she remembered she has been to a wedding and the bride had the same first name that my father.
She would like to organize a big meeting in Central Park with all the people who have the same name than ours. How many will we be? She is happy each time she meets someone with the same name. Me too.
In the same time, i have online conversation with a French H baby, a Lubavitch who lives in the same area where i used to live in Paris. He thinks that Americans are more open-minded with Hasidim. He prefers to meet an American shiksa when he comes here 2, 3 times a year. That's weird for me to speak French with a Hasidic.
I keep on selecting all the emails i traded so far. Sometimes i re read them and i can see how ignorant i was and how many things i have to learn to be a 'perfect' Jewish shiksa.
Thursday, August 8, 2013
A confusing meeting
Yesterday just before starting the closing, a Jewish man in his 50s came.
He was born in USA, traveled a lot in Europe, and used to live in Italy during 8 years. He spent time in France, Vienna… too.
The conversation was very interesting about WWII stories with the Marshal Pétain (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philippe_Pétain), a rabbi, the pope… Or how to survive and save people for his own interest. He told me that Pétain was not anti-semitic. But i just found that article in the NYT: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/06/world/europe/06paris.html?_r=0
He was anti-semitic for sure. Maybe he saved some Jews by giving them passports to go to Spain, but it absolutely doesn't excuse what he did during his Vichy governance.
I can't report all the details about these stories he told me.
We talked about Jewishness because he started to tell me that i have a Jewish soul.
One day i met a woman in her 60s, born and raised Catholic. She got converted Jewish and was from Chabad. She was wearing casual clothes, didn't wear wig but eating Kosher. She was a little crazy. She told me she didn't believe in Dog. She felt close to Jewish religion but she didn't want me to tell to anyone she was born Catholic. The man said she was fake and also stupid to act like that.
This man told me that if i wanted to get converted, Chabad will make a sort of investigation to check if i have Jewish family.
I told him that i didn't believe in Dog, he replied: 'Me neither'. Did he break some Shabbos? He didn't want to tell me so i could imagine whatever and, later he said that when he used to live in Rome, he forgot sometimes there was already Friday night. The Hasidic community in Rome doesn't live in community like in NY. His ex wife was from Argentina and they lived besides Klaus Barbie, the butcher of Lyon (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klaus_Barbie).
He thought that i probably believed in Dog. I will believe in Dog if he talks to me in person. Maybe he already did, the man said. :-)
He doesn't believe in Dog but he believes in a creator, he doesn't want to hear about the scientific theory of the world creation. That's fine! The theory of evolution by Darwin? Neither he does.
He said he came from Adam not a monkey like black people. Whaaaaaaat?
That's totally racist to say that. He agreed he was racist. A trauma as a kid with black kids since his childhood as he said. Come on man, there were kids. Kids are so cruel.
A hasidic young man was outside and he wanted to make a bet with money he was not from Chabad. Money for a bet? No way! I only bet a bottle of French champagne or something quirky.
He showed me a video from 1989 when the ex Messiah of Chabad blessed him with one dollar.
He was on his way to Vienna for business.
He showed me too some photos of his grandchild who lives in California. Her daughter had a scarf on her hair so i asked if she wore a wig. He didn't know. He will go to California soon to meet her. What's wrong with his daughter?
Or is it something that i always noticed in NY? People say they are friends since 15 years but they don't know each other. They don't know if they are kids, how they live… but they are very good friends. What do you talk about with your friends? The weather, at what you have been to the gym…? :-)
He doesn't want to look like Hasidic but he was proud when i said he looked like Jewish. :-)
That was so obvious he was Hasidic with his black pants and tee-shirt.
And after, i saw the fringes.
Finally, the young man went away, so we didn't know if he was right or not.
He was born in USA, traveled a lot in Europe, and used to live in Italy during 8 years. He spent time in France, Vienna… too.
The conversation was very interesting about WWII stories with the Marshal Pétain (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philippe_Pétain), a rabbi, the pope… Or how to survive and save people for his own interest. He told me that Pétain was not anti-semitic. But i just found that article in the NYT: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/06/world/europe/06paris.html?_r=0
He was anti-semitic for sure. Maybe he saved some Jews by giving them passports to go to Spain, but it absolutely doesn't excuse what he did during his Vichy governance.
I can't report all the details about these stories he told me.
We talked about Jewishness because he started to tell me that i have a Jewish soul.
One day i met a woman in her 60s, born and raised Catholic. She got converted Jewish and was from Chabad. She was wearing casual clothes, didn't wear wig but eating Kosher. She was a little crazy. She told me she didn't believe in Dog. She felt close to Jewish religion but she didn't want me to tell to anyone she was born Catholic. The man said she was fake and also stupid to act like that.
This man told me that if i wanted to get converted, Chabad will make a sort of investigation to check if i have Jewish family.
I told him that i didn't believe in Dog, he replied: 'Me neither'. Did he break some Shabbos? He didn't want to tell me so i could imagine whatever and, later he said that when he used to live in Rome, he forgot sometimes there was already Friday night. The Hasidic community in Rome doesn't live in community like in NY. His ex wife was from Argentina and they lived besides Klaus Barbie, the butcher of Lyon (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Klaus_Barbie).
He thought that i probably believed in Dog. I will believe in Dog if he talks to me in person. Maybe he already did, the man said. :-)
He doesn't believe in Dog but he believes in a creator, he doesn't want to hear about the scientific theory of the world creation. That's fine! The theory of evolution by Darwin? Neither he does.
He said he came from Adam not a monkey like black people. Whaaaaaaat?
That's totally racist to say that. He agreed he was racist. A trauma as a kid with black kids since his childhood as he said. Come on man, there were kids. Kids are so cruel.
A hasidic young man was outside and he wanted to make a bet with money he was not from Chabad. Money for a bet? No way! I only bet a bottle of French champagne or something quirky.
He showed me a video from 1989 when the ex Messiah of Chabad blessed him with one dollar.
He was on his way to Vienna for business.
He showed me too some photos of his grandchild who lives in California. Her daughter had a scarf on her hair so i asked if she wore a wig. He didn't know. He will go to California soon to meet her. What's wrong with his daughter?
Or is it something that i always noticed in NY? People say they are friends since 15 years but they don't know each other. They don't know if they are kids, how they live… but they are very good friends. What do you talk about with your friends? The weather, at what you have been to the gym…? :-)
He doesn't want to look like Hasidic but he was proud when i said he looked like Jewish. :-)
That was so obvious he was Hasidic with his black pants and tee-shirt.
And after, i saw the fringes.
Finally, the young man went away, so we didn't know if he was right or not.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)